|Photo by augustfinster on pixabay|
I didn’t want to kill it. I just didn’t want it in the house.
While meditating, I saw movement out of the corner of my eye. Yes, my eyes were open during meditation…it’s one of the types I practice. Anyway, I looked and there was something crawling along the bottom of the window. It was a wasp. I’d seen a wasp flying just outside my window a lot lately, but now it was on this side. I paused my meditating and wondered what to do.
Finally, I decided to get a plastic container and capture it so I could release it outside. When I came back from collecting the container, it was gone. But where did it go? Damn. I looked around, but didn’t see it. I decide to go back to meditating when it flew back to the window. Okay. I’d see what I could do.
It’s funny how afraid we are of small things even if they can sting. I’d never been stung before and didn’t want to find out if I was allergic. I wondered if trying to capture it would piss it off.
I took the container and slowly put it over the wasp. It just sat there. Now what? I moved the container hoping the wasp would walk in. Nothing. I waited. Finally, it began to go inside the container but only near the edge. How was I going to pull the container away and cover it without it getting out? The wasp just sat there and then began grooming itself. Then is started to get really slow. Was it running out of air?
This was ridiculous. I wanted to get back to meditating. It was now or never. I pulled the container away as slow as I could. The wasp didn’t move. I covered it. I’d captured it!
I took it downstairs and put the container on the bench outside and uncovered it. The wasp simply flew up and away. No problem.
I’m glad I decided to release the wasp. I’m not sure how it got in or why it decided to visit me other than they are builders and I’ve been thinking a lot about building a life and a business. The more I read about wasp, it felt as though it was confirming my current path.
The Universe speaks to us in many ways. Spirit guides us from within and sometimes it shows up in what seems to be outside of us. But I never really believed there was an outside exactly. My inner world and the outer world always felt like one thing. The world of Spirit was in the mix as well. It was confusing as a child. I got the feeling others didn’t feel the same way. As I grew older I learned to see these worlds as separate just enough to understand the constructs humans built. But there is still a sense of fluidity of being.
Wasp is another sign of spring. It’s a time of building and creating. It’s a time to make a fresh start. I’ve been afraid of yet another start of my business. But this time I feel my inner strength is back. I’ve done the work to take much of the sting out of my past. I’ve grown in awareness and won’t let the little things deter me.
I got back to meditating that day. I didn’t lose focus due to the wasp visitation. If anything, I gained more focus. I trusted Nature, I trusted the wasp. It trusted me. As I released it, I released myself. Life turns on these small incidents. I may still have moments of doubt. I may falter now and then, but there is no going back. Last September I felt as though I was entering a threshold where the other side represented me no longer hindered by my past. I have walked through now. It has been the longest step. And I know there is no arrival time just this movement forward that flows from being, the being that is home, the place I never left.